Skye hurt.

She supposed that was a good thing, it meaning she was still alive. But every bone, every muscle, every nerve in her body seemed to be screaming in protest. Her mind tried to put the disjointed pieces together, completing the picture from the night just past.

The kobold army, the orcs and that red dragon. Skye remembered riding out on Thunder, watching Ian lead a wing into the fray. Corwin followed on the other side, and Skye smiled. She had sent a small contingent of sharpshooters with each man, keeping the bulk of the archery force with her, to mount the preliminary charge. All had gone well for a while.

Her thigh throbbed, as if feeling the arrow imbedded in it's muscle again. One of the kobolds had gotten her, and more than anything, her carelessness had made her angry. Dropping from Thunder's back, she continued the assault on foot, no longer able to deal with the Arabian's skittish movements beneath her. Skye frowned, her eyes still closed as the pictures in her head grew more murky.

A lone kobold had attacked her from behind, his dagger sunk to the hilt in her side. Before the pain had completely taken hold, Skye turned and slashed at him with the dagger in her own hand. And then had come the command. The dragon was overhead... "Archers FIRE!" Skye had bellowed as best she could, drawing the longbow back and letting fly with an arrow of her own. The flash of light from Asgorath, battling the beast in the nighttime sky and then, blackness. Skye had no way of knowing if her archers had felled the beast, or if the platinum dragon had... perhaps it was both. She had passed out, her life's blood ebbing away ever so slowly as the darkness consumed her.

Since that time, the darkness had become her friend. Skye welcomed it's enfolding arms that enveloped her each time the pain became too intense for her to bear. Someone had found her, Asgorath had brought her home, and the healing had begun. The bones would mend, as would the other injuries sustained, but the pain would not lessen before its time. The knitted skeleton and musclework was still fragile, and Skye slept in a blessed healing sleep. Only Ian's voice had penetrated the blackness last night. She had called for him, albeit in a whisper, and he had responded. "How many men did I lose, Ian?" He couldn't tell her, he didn't know. Skye cried silently for the families left. "I'm sorry Ian...so sorry...I love you..."

Now she lay there healing, her body still, her breathing stronger. She shifted upon the mattress in the infirmary and groaned softly. She was alive, and she felt like hell. The blackness took her away once more and Skye slept.

Skye Blackthorn 9/99


Absence of Light II

No change... No change at all. Skye sighed as she woke up, hoping to at least see a brightening of the darkness that shrouded her sight. Groaning slightly, she shifted, having fallen asleep curled up in a chair, her body protested to the stretching of those cramped muscles.

Last night had been their wedding anniversary, and the Blackthorns had spent it... fighting. Skye pushed the tousled coppery hair from her face out of habit, and felt around with her hands until she was standing. Testing the battered body, she sighed with relief as the pain seemed to be ebbing. Skye raised her hands again and managed to find the door frame to the infirmary. Hearing noises in the firehall, she called out gently.

"Hallo? Is anyone there?"

Ascellon came to her side, chiding her softly for being out of bed. She truly felt better, truly. And perhaps being around people would help her feel more a part of things. It was hard, sitting in the dark, and knowing the people around her were doing things she could not see, talking about her in whispers, and feeling as pitiful for her as Skye did for herself. She had to start somewhere... for herself. New road, one step at a time.

Skye smiled at him a bit. "My hairbrush... I am sure my hair is a mess and I don't know where Camille put it."

Ascellon retrieved it from her nightstand and Skye went to work, trying to smooth the tangled mass of copper curls. Using her fingers to pull and poke, she ran hands over it, smoothing it. Before she could ask how it looked, Lord Blackhawke had come into the infirmary. He had teased her, joking with her about her appearance and Skye, unable to see the smile on his face, or the twinkle in his eye, had taken him at his word. She had nearly fallen over the chair and in her anger lashed out at Stephan.

"This is funny isn't it? Now that I cannae defend myself, ye and my husband have turned into the bullies of the playground, Hawke. I cannot see dammit. I cannot see at all and I am scared. Why can ye and Ian nae understand that?"

Blackhawke took her hand, squeezing it gently and admitted to her that he was but jesting, covering the pain and worry that they all were feeling. "You are still beautiful, and we love you, hurry up and get well."

Skye's eyes filled with tears, and her apology to Blackhawke fell upon his broad shoulders as he walked a bit away from her. Turning to Ascellon then she asked him for clothes, determined to dress herself properly. Thoughtfully, a tunic and leggings were placed on the bed before her, and woolen stockings for her feet. Skye ran her hands over the garments sighing in relief. She would have never managed a gown and petticoats by herself.

Taking a breath, she quickly shed the robe and the nightrail soon followed. Grabbing the tunic, she felt for the front and slid it over her head, smoothing the fabric down to mid-thigh. Stockings next followed, being pulled up her slender legs, and finally the leggings. Skye smiled, hoping that everything at least looked straight. She retrieved her hairbrush and began to work the tangles again from her hair.

Unbeknownst to her, a man watched her struggle, a light of admiration in his eyes. Off to the side, his silence cloaking him from her perception, he followed her every move... and fought the urge to step forward and comfort her in his arms.

Skye Blackthorn 9/99


Absence of Light III

"Ian, if I could still see, would you go?"

"Yes." The word reluctantly left his lips on a sigh.

"Then you must go now. However, if your reason would have been that you couldnae bear a night from my arms..." Skye chided him gently, smiling at him.

"Well there's that too."

"Nay Ian, it's too late to throw it in now. Go husband, and watch over Ferret. I will stay in Camelot, and I will be safe. Just promise me you'll hold me close until you leave."

**********

It was cold in the bedchamber, colder than it had been. Skye rolled over, even in her sleep seeking his warmth next to her. Stretching out her hands she felt nothing but the indention on his pillow. Would that she could open her eyes and see him there, but again, no change. Skye grabbed his pillow and held it to her, thankful that his scent clung there. Woodsy and spicy, and always the drifting sandalwood that she wore. How appropriate that the two of them should blend together, even here.

Curling up and pulling the covers around her more tightly, Skye sighed, her sightless eyes again filling with tears. She could feel them prick and burn in the sockets, trace their wetness on her cheeks, but it did not help her sight return. All was still black. No shades of gray, no flashes of color or light, in fact her world was as if no light existed at all. The shaking had finally stopped in the wee hours of the night as she lay within the shelter of his embrace. She had been scared, so scared. What good a blind healer? Without Ian, Jaelyn would have surely died. But now... she had a son, a lusty wailing boy, that Skye's practiced hands told her must have weighed a full eight and a half pounds, and hair on his little head as well. Ten fingers, ten toes... What she would have given to know if he looked like Jaelyn or more like his father.

She had done well to stay composed during the delivery, but afterward, after Jaelyn awoke from the trance, Skye had gathered her things and walked outside. All along the ride home, she had sobbed, holding onto Fyre's mane. She fought the helplessness, the despair that washed over her. Jaelyn was safe, alive, and the baby too. It shouldn't matter that she needed help to accomplish what before she could do herself. Indeed she had often thought she could do such deeds with her eyes closed. She had been wrong.

What good a blind healer? What good a blind wife? Skye kept hearing the words spoken to her over and over again. Corwin, Ian, Mallory, Jolieve...they all believed the malady in her mind. They all believed that she was keeping herself from seeing. She had railed against that idea. She wanted to see. She wanted her life back. She hated being in the dark. It couldn't be her mind, she was NOT mad. Could it? Was it? Skye didn't want to think so. But now, the doubt was there, and with no one to hold her, and to ease the fears away, it began to take root, and sprout...

And the darkness began to spread over her heart.

Skye Blackthorn 9/99


Absence of Light IV

Peligrance stood slowly and walked to the workroom, knocking on the door. Skye was inside, sitting upon a stool, her head bowed, tears streaming down her face. She whispered, "Go away...please....just go..." But he knocked again and slowly opened the door, quietly tapping on the board three times. Seeing Skye, he walked over and handed her a handkerchief.

She sighed, feeling the handkerchief brush her hand, "Peligrance... you're as stubborn as I am." He nodded, taking her hand and putting her fingers to his lips so she could read the words that slipped silently from his mouth, "You alright?"

Skye sniffed and shook her head, "No, but I have to pretend to be, don't I? A friend of mine would have died if not for Ian last night. And I'm no help without my eyes. I can't even tell you what the baby looks like. I... dammit."

Pel's eyes darkened a bit in sorrow and he hugged her. Skye let herself be held for a moment, wiping the tears from her face. "This is harder than I thought." The mute nodded, the words silent as his mouth moved. "I know, but it will get better."

Skye took a deep breath and let it out slowly, removing her hand. "Will it? Will it get better? I don't believe it at the moment. They all think it's in my head, that I'm mad, daft as a duck as my Da said. I'm not, Pel... I swear I'm not."

He nodded again trying silently to comfort her with words that none could hear, tugging her hand again to his face. "I know. I have seen blindness before of the mind and this is not it. I have been doing some research on it."

Skye sighed. The words he spoke were not recognizable to her, "I am going to turn the position of healer, and my workroom, over to you, Peligrance. We cannot even communicate because I cannot see. And the lip-reading is damned near impossible. What good a blind healer anyway? What good a blind woman at all?" With those words, Skye turned and started out of the workroom.

Peligrance stopped her, again putting her fingers to his lips "No."

Skye turned her face up to his so that he could see the ravages the tears have wrought. "I could have killed her. Let me go. If you care at all... let me go."

Peligrance sighed, letting her go, and Skye swept past him to head outside.

A bit later, Skye stood just outside the firehall door resting against the cool stone, her face turned upward toward the sky. The sun was warm on her skin and she closed her eyes to draw deep ragged breaths and calm her rioting nerves. A thought came to her, perhaps they were right. Perhaps it was just a leap of faith. Skye searched her mind, her heart and soul, and was suddenly reminded of a prayer to the archangels, a prayer of the innocents, to the protectors. A prayer to those much stronger, much wiser, and much more powerful. She called upon them now to help her dispel the darkness.

Skye began to slowly, very slowly, whisper the prayer in Gaelic. The words flowed over her tongue like water over the smooth stones at the bottom of a brook. The chant went on and on, quite emotional and fervent at times, the undertone pleading... begging... Skye stepped out two or three steps from the shadow of the wall, the sun now beating down upon her fully. She smiled a bit. The angels would surely not let her down. The chant of the prayer continued on her lips, growing in intensity and passion, drawing on the light around her.

Skye Blackthorn 10/99


Absence of Light V

The scream tore through the very soul of Camelot, "NO! No dammit....NO!"

Grasping her staff in both hands, Skye began swinging it wildly, repeatedly striking the stone wall, the grass, and the path around her. The cane bounced and reeled off of the unintentional targets as her rage came to a boil.

From inside the hall, Ascellon heard screaming and rushed out, confronted by the sight of his friend trying to do damage to everything around her, including herself. "Skye!"

At the sound she lost her grip a bit. She cursed now at the top of her lungs in every language she knows. The stick slipped from her hand, flying through the air, and she fell to her knees, striking the ground with her fists.

Ascellon ran toward her, getting smacked by the flying staff. "Jesus, Skye!"

Skye raised up on her knees and leaned back so that her face was pointed skyward. Her voice rang out an anguished bellow, "Give it back! Give me back my sight!"

Ascellon's throat tightened a bit, feeling her anguish, and he moved to her side to help pick her up. "Skye... I am here, Skye...."

For her part, Skye was now mostly silent, her screaming done for the moment. Tears were still streaming, but for all intents and purposes, a stone statue could be weeping. Her voice was flat and emotionless, "Let me go."

Ascellon shook his head. "No, let me help you."

"There is no one who can help me, Ascellon." She swallowed, a muscle working in her jaw, "All I know is... I am in the dark... again. I have prayed. I have searched my heart and mind. I have hoped every time I close my eyes that when I open them, there will be some change... even just a little, but there is nothing. Ascellon, the Skye you know is gone. There is nothing left but the darkness now."

"There has to be something and I will find it. I swear I'll find it!"

She shook her head. "No. I have taken enough from you, and enough of your time. You need to live your life, my friend."

"You are my friend, you and Ian my family, Skye, and I won't leave until you can see again."

The redhead clenched her teeth. "And if that day never comes? If the darkness never leaves? What then, Ascellon? Will you hate me for the time I stole from you? The same way Ian will hate me for no longer being the woman he loved? No. I prefer death to that." With those words, Skye again returnsed to the hall, groping with her hands. Her staff was somewhere outside, forgotten in the grass. She went to the bar and hoarsely called the bartender over. "Lumiere. Whiskey. Now." He brought her a bottle of whiskey and a shotglass. Without so much as a smirk, she acknowledge it as he pressed the shotglass into her hand. "You'll have to believe me that I'll catch up with you on the tip, Lumes."

Skye took up residence at the end of the bar, pouring herself a shot of whiskey. Her movements were slowed by the necessity as she had to feel everything with her fingertips. She worked well on the bottle and before long she'd knocked back a fair amount. She sat alone, oblivious to everything but the feel of the bottle and the taste of the whiskey singing through her veins.

Ascellon walked back into the firehall with Skye's staff in his hand. He approached her at the bar. "You left this outside."

She shrugged, attempting to knock his hand away, "I don't care." and poured herself another drink, draining it within seconds.

"You trying to drive me away, Skye?"

"I told you, you deserve more. What good me now Ascellon? What good to anyone?" Obviously drunk now, Skye was becoming a bit belligerent.

Ascellon deftly removed the bottle and glass. "Enough. You are much stronger than this."

Turning and groping for the recently removed bottle, Skye took both hands and shoved in Ascellon's direction, striking him in the chest. "What the hell do you know? Go away. Leave me alone." She stood, furious now, her hair unbound and wild around her face, "As a request, GO TO HELL, Ascellon... and take me with you!"

Letting out a soft "oomph" as she hit him in the chest, Ascellon moved forward again, his voice low and dangerous. "Nae Skye, you wouldn't like it there."

Skye railed at him, the most convenient target, "I AM ALREADY THERE, DAMMIT! I AM THERE NOW."

"Stop it, Skye," he said calmly but firmly.

Her face reddened, the veins sticking out on her neck as she yelled at him. "NO...I will not stop it...I am BLIND... I cannot SEE... and now I am not only scared... I am MADDER THAN HELL!"

Ascellon gave a very Blackthorn-like 'hmmph' and bent to put her unceremoniously over his shoulder. He promptly carried her out to the pond, ignoring the pounding his back was taking from her fists.

"You damned barbarian! Put me down damn you... put me down!!"

"Very well, Skye, " Ascellon said, and dropped her into the shallow end of the pond, drawing from her a gasp and a scramble to stay above water.

Coming up sputtering and kicking, her anger had not cooled and she tosses out scathingly, "How will you explain to Ian that you drowned his wife, hmm?"

"I will take that chance."

Skye stood still, waiting for his voice to give her some clue as to where he was. Upon hearing it, she launched herself at him, knocking him to the ground with her shoulder. She fell on top of him and began to strike at him with her fists. "You son of a motherless jackal! You demon spawn! Ascellon, how could you even IMAGINE the hell I am going through right now?!"

After dumping her to the ground, a fitting tribute to her unthinking insults, Ascellon began to walk away, leaving her kicking and screaming at the earth much like a two year old on a temper tantrum. He made his way a few steps back toward the hall before an odd gleam appeared in his eyes. Turning, he hauled her up again, once more throwing her over his shoulder. Taken by surprise, Skye pounded his back again, kicking her feet. "Damn it, Ascellon... Am I a sack of potatoes here?"

"Nae Skye, the potatoes know when to shut up."

Skye Blackthorn 10/99


Absence of Light VI

Skye oofed as she was bounced along all the way to the arena where Ascellon lowered her to her feet. "You want to fight? We're in the Arena now. Here, take your staff."

She held out a hand, reaching for the staff as she heard the whisper of Ascellon's sword being drawn from its sheath. She snarled at him, taunting, wanting to incite his rage to match her own, "Steel, Ascellon? Fine. So it will be done."

Having learned the lesson of a cooler head prevailing, the knight smiled only a bit and shoved the blade into the ground. "Nay. Pikes will do for this, woman."

Jolieve walked into the arena. She looked at Ascellon, then at Skye, and headed toward the entrance to the arena floor from the stands. Drawing her own sword, she placed the tip of it in the dirt, then looked to the spectators. Her purpose was clear. No one would be allowed out of the stands unless they wished to go through her. She gave Ascellon a nod as he proceeded from the weapons rack, carrying two pikes.

Walking back to the center of the arena, Ascellon handed one of the pikes to Skye, "Here, use this one."

Skye grabbed the pike and swung at him before he had a chance to get ready. Smiling a she heard Ascellon fall to the ground. As he arose quite angered, he turned and effortlessly knocked the pike from her hands. "Playing dirty now? Come on, pick it up."

She cursed at him and his easy win over her. Picking up her own staff, she swung again, taunting him in her singsong voice. "Talk to me damn you. You have the advantage. At least let me know where you are." Another swing but it was blocked by her opponent.

"Come on Skye, oh brave warrior, fight. You can do better than this… FIGHT!"

The redhead advanced toward his voice, jabbing the pike out in front of her all the while, searching for her foe. Her eyes were tearing without her even realizing it and her hands gripping the staff with white knuckles as she struck out at him again, and again, being blocked and bested by him at every turn.

"Is that the best you can do?" Ascellon taunted back, wearing her out striking her staff again and again. "Come on and fight. I'm still waiting for a challenge."

Skye grew angrier and more desperate, swinging now off balance and nearly toppling over. She righted herself and tilted her head back and forth, listening for him. "Hit me you bastard... or are you afraid of a blind woman?" She then waited, listening for her opponent's next move.

Ascellon shook his head and tapped her weapon with his own. "Come on Skye, you can do better than that." As he struck again at her pike, harder than the last time, the woman centered on his voice and lunged forward. Ascellon danced away and landed his blow on her unprotected side. "Slow, Skye…very slow…I'm over here!"

She yelped at the contact and turned slashing out at him again wildly, having the shot attempt blocked and receiving a hard pop on her bottom.

"What a weak attempt. You started this. You wanted to fight." The knight dodged her moves, jabbing her and poking her as her thrusts grew wilder. As she whirled away from him, he floored her with a strike square to the back. Not one to give up, she grunted and turned, then struck out at him with her feet as she heard him approach to help her up.

"Ungrateful are we?" he taunted softly as he pulled at one hand. "Fine." He let go, sending her sprawling again.

"Ascellon, damn you!" She had her staff ready now and lashed out at him from the ground. Again he avoided the strike then bent in to pull her to standing from the opposite side. "Foolish woman, give up. Just give up."

Refusing, Skye stood, her hair wild as her head turned to catch his position and she swung at him with the last of her strength and her rage. She gasped as her opponent turned, striking the staff hard, knocking it out of her hands and into the dirt then leveling her to the arena floor once more by sweeping her feet out from under her.

The fight was over.

Skye stayed down, defeated now, and the sobs poured from her wracking body. Ascellon dropped his pike and moved to her side. Kneeling down, he picked her up and held her close, the tears forming in his own eyes as he whispered hoarsely "Why do you have to be so stubborn?"

"I don't want this. I want to see. I... Gods help me, Ascellon... I wish you had killed me instead of letting me stay like THIS."

"You will see dammit, and there will be no talk of dying."

Jolieve sighed, seeing the match over and with a warning look to the stands, she crossed to the combatants. "Everything alright? Nothing broken?"

At Ascellon's answering head shake, Jolieve spoke again, a bit hesitant at first, "Skye..."

The redhead turned her sightless green eyes toward the other woman's voice, "Aye Jolie?"

"You can fight better than that, you know it. The art is not in what you can see before you... but what is in your heart."

Ascellon looked at Jolieve and nodded his agreement, then turning, he carried Skye out of the arena and to her home. Jolieve sighed and murmured to herself, more than anyone. "And remember the sky is darkest, just before the dawn."

Skye Blackthorn 10/99


Absence of Light VII

And through that terrible evening, Ascellon sat next to her, listening to her alternate between anger and bewilderment, despair and terror. Encouraging her tears, and keeping her safe, the storm had raged through the night, and when it abated, and Skye fell asleep, there dawned a new day. A day which brought resignation of her fate and the plans she would make alone.

"You're making a mistake Skye. Ian will never let you release him from his vows of marriage."

"Ascellon listen to reason… if he stays with me, he'll resent the things he's going to miss because of my condition. I told you, I'll not have him hating me, anything but that. Now, I owe Glen a walk, and a talk, so if you don't mind?"

The forest path was leafy and green and quiet. Birds sang muted songs as they walked along. "Things have been a bit ahh... trying lately Glen. I am sorry if I have not been available to you."

Glen Darkheart turned to take a look behind him as he glanced towards the castle. He sighed then looked back to her. "You have a lot of people who care for you, Skye. I'm beginning to think my skills are not going to do much good with all of them around." He smiled. "It is quite alright lady, but they are right. You do need to take a good long look at yourself."

"The anger and rage is gone. Now all I feel is... resignation. There are things I must set to rights before I try making any sort of existence this way. I grow sick of talking about…me. I do not wish to be a burden to any and the entire kingdom seems preoccupied with making sure I have tea, or if my tunics are on straight. I am blind. There is naught I can do about it....and they need to live their own lives. Their pity and resentment later I can do without."

Her companion shook his head. "That I agree with. They only care about you, Skye." He sighs. "But I do understand your point. But, you are making a mistake with Ian..."

"And I care about them. Ian most of all. That's why it is best I disengage myself from their lives and cease being a burden to them... and to him."

"You are not a burden to them, Skye. Ian loves you... and love transcends injury, even death. It's one of the few things that can defeat death, and you know that."

Skye squeezed his arm, and deftly changed the subject, not willing to dwell on thoughts of Ian. "Now tell me how I can be useful. Tell me what assistance you need and I will see if I can marshall support for you."

"It's actually Ian's help, as well as yours, that I need, Skye." He smiles slightly, "My people... my home is being plagued by a demon of incredible power. There are only two weapons that can defeat him, and they are both here on earth. One is the sword Heritage once wielded by Sir Kirsten Marcum. The other was The Oracle, held by King Jander Shiningstarr. I had the Oracle. It was the weapon I took from the Assassin who was trying to kill Jolieve on my last visit to Camelot. I went back to my people... only to find that it was too late. My people are dying, and my sword, the Oracle, was stolen from me yet again, and the thief came here. I need yours and Ian's help to find it."

"Glen, I am sure Ian will help. Are there any clues as to who the thief is?" She talked as she walked along, being quite deliberate in keeping herself out of any plans for rescue. Glen stopped walking, turning to look at her. "It's your help I want. You may be blind, but I have enough faith in you. I know very well that you have other skills that are useful. I need both of you to help or I will fail."

Skye stopped as well, no longer having his arm to guide her. "Don't ask this of me, Glen. Other than Mindspeak, I have no magic at all, really. And the powers I have are a secondhand gift from my sister Aidan. I can barely dress myself and have left the healing arts in Camelot to Peligrance and those magical and psionic healers which abound. I was an archer, Glen, and a sailor, a warrior, mother and wife. Now I am just...a blind lady. And before you chide me, the pity is gone. In its place is simply resignation and realism. No starry thoughts fill my dreams. I no longer expect to see again. It is over, done. Fate hae dealt me this hand. I shall play it out."

"You are wrong... " he sighed, "you are still a healer. The way you were working the herbs in your office showed me that and a warrior is judged not by their fighting prowess, but the way they help others. A mother you will always be. Nothing can change that. As for you being a wife, again that's another that you can always be. Ian doesn't want to lose you and you don't want to lose him."

"Tell me what you want us to do. I'll give you only that much Glen... a perhaps... a maybe.. a... we shall see. No pun intended."

Glen smiled slightly, having won a slight victory over her. "First off, I just need to know of rumors you hear pertaining to a magical blade, most likely a new one in the land. I'll do the actual hunting myself, but if you hear anything I ask that you let me know. The second thing is that, if needed, you allow Camelot soldiers to help me retrieve it."

Skye nodded, "My ears you have, and to be honest, I have found that if I do not draw undue attention to myself, I am left pretty well alone. The words fly around me in the firehall and my hearing seems keener. As for the soldiers, they are Ian's to command. He is away at the present time. How soon will you need to mobilize forces?"

"That is only one thing you'll notice, Skye." He smiled, "The gods knew what they were doing when they created life. They were smart in that act and when you lose one sense the others heighten to take over. When I find the sword, then I will know if I need help to retrieve it." He shrugged and then smiles slightly as an idea occured to him. "You know Skye... I imagine you're hearing isn't the only sense that has become more acute... If you would like, I can teach you how to use your others to take your sight's place. I used to teach blind Kanari how to use their other senses to fight and heal." His words caused the redhead at his side to stop as if remembering something. She then gave a small shake of her head, forgetting for a moment that she was being watched.

Glen quirked a brow. "Lady?" He placed a hand on her shoulder. "Skye, what is it?"

Skye shook her head, "Nothing...forget it...wouldn't work anyway..." But Glen tilted his head and sighed slightly. "Skye..." He then went silent, closing his eyes and tapping his left temple a few times. He focused on her and a bead of sweat formed on his brow from concentration. His face then relaxed as he opened his eyes with a look of surprise frozen onto his face. "You have... an ability? What is this... Second Sight you're hiding in the back of your mind?"

She lowered her head, shaking it. "A gift...from my sister. She's...Druid. I've only used it twice, to tell the sex of unborn babes... and then I put it away. I don't trust it, I don't even know how to use it really. It's...unreliable. I should probably tell you about me and Aidan. Perhaps it's time I told someone the whole truth about everything."

Skye Blackthorn 10/99


Absence of Light VIII

Glen Darkheart smiled. "It's a power that you should learn how to use and you can't learn if you don't pra..." He cut himself off as she spoke again. "I'll listen to your story, Skye, but... why tell me?"

She sighed. "Because I can't tell anyone else without them feeling sorry for me. Unless you'd rather not hear it?"

"No, I have no problem with you telling me. I was just curious."

"Well... I am the eldest of eight. There are six boys between myself and my sister Aidan. Ma had despaired of ever having another girl child and Da made a deal with the Druid. Sure enough, Ma got pregnant with a baby and it was Aidan. No more children followed and of all of us, Aidan may LOOK like me, but she's got... gifts. Healing, teleporting, MindSpeak, Second Sight... and a few others..." She sighed then continued, "The druids have a celebration on the day that a girl comes of age. On her sixteenth birthday, before she takes the vows to surrender herself to their Goddess of Fertility, she has the option of gifting someone close to her. Aidan gave me the secondhand gifts of MindSpeak and Second Sight. Second Sight carries with it the covenant that should I ever use it for evil... or cause another's death... I'll not only lose it forever but my primary sight as well." Skye laughs harshly. "I've already done that without help. And because I so feared this, I tucked the gift away, unused, unopened. Like a forgotten present at Yule."

Glen waved his finger at her slightly, although the gesture was lost on her. "Skye, my mentor once told me 'With great power, comes great responsibility.' I have not yet heard an equal truth. This Gift... what does it do?"

"I get... flashes... pictures in my mind... of things that are to come... things before they happen."

"I think I understand. You know..." He paused a moment as if calculating things in his mind. "With a little practice, you could harness that to be very effective. You may not be able to 'see' the piece of furniture, but you'd know when it was going to be sat in your way."

Skye shrugged. "The issue is, I never know if what is in my head is going to happen in the next moment... or five... or next week. It is unreliable and I am not sure if there is a way to train it to be more so."

"But there is the chance. Skye, your sight is gone, this is true, but you are not at all an invalid. The fact of the matter is that you've already started to notice your other senses increasing to make up for your loss. I'm sure someone in Camelot could teach you how to live very effectively using those, or... You could 'reopen' this power you have and try to use it."

She pondered the idea and sighed, then gave him a nod. "I will consider it. I will admit that I do not hold a lot of optimism at the moment. I think I used up my quota during the first few days of my being blind, hoping that my sight would return. I guess now the trick is trying to make some sort of life for myself." Again there was the omission of any mention of her husband and family or friends.

"Aye. Make a life for yourself. In Ian's arms... " Glen patted her hand lightly. "I know the thought of your relationship with him is painful, Skye, but I also know how strong love can be." He paused, "You do still love him, don't you?"

"More than I love anything. I would nae consider leaving him if I didn't. I cannot be a burden to him, Glen, he will end up resenting all he misses because of me."

"If he loves you, then to lose you would be to lose everything." He smiled, almost as if remembering a love of his own. "You will not be a burden to him and even if you are... don't you think that should be his choice to make? You have to know how much it would hurt him... hurt you both to lose each other."

"But Glen...'tis like a... swordsman's arm. Let us say that you are a swordsman in battle... and you sustain a serious injury to your sword arm. Would you rather have the thing cut completely away and make a new life for yourself without it... or have it remain, crippled and useless... and a reminder of all it once was?"

Glen knelt down and took her hand. He pressed it to his cheek. "Each and every wound can be a hindrance... or something that makes you stronger." He ran her hand along the scar at his jawline. "I kept this... I could have had it healed many times, but I refused because it reminded me to be stronger than I was before... to keep improving. Thus is the way you have to proceed. Use this difficulty as a reason to strengthen yourself and your love, then go and share that love with Ian. It's a chance for you to become a person you never thought possible and to be better than you ever thought possible."

Skye let her fingers lightly graze the scar and her countenance changed. Unguarded, her face showed the pain she felt for him, for Ian, and for herself. "Why has no woman claimed your heart? Why haven't the ladies swarmed, refusing you the ability to walk with me out here?"

"I don't have the answer to that. Maybe I don't stick around long enough for them to take notice."

The redhead nodded and gave him the ghost of a smile. "Perhaps. And perhaps you should think about letting them take notice of you. Now I have to ask you something. Why me? Why do you care? You've been so helpful, solicitous...I am grateful, but confused as to why..."

Glen smiled. "Because I saw someone in pain, someone who needed the help that I could offer, and because I happened to be there at the right time. To tell you the truth... I do have a woman I love, Skye. Her name is Leona, but for the moment she's stuck back on Samvara and I don't know if I'll ever see her again."

Skye smiled back, reaching again to touch his face. "Then perhaps my return gift to you will be to see that you make it back to her, hmm?" She gave his arm a squeeze.

"Perhaps, but first I'll see you and Ian back together. Come... I'll escort you back to Camelot, this time with at least some of your confidence restored eh?"

"If not with my confidence restored, then perhaps with a lighter load to carry."

"Well, it's a start." He reached down to take her hand and help her to her feet. "Don't lose hope, Skye. Never lose hope... and don't lose Ian. You two are a good couple, good for each other, and good for Camelot."

Skye took his hand and stood, again using her free hand to lay on his arm. "Thank you for not only being a guardian of sorts but for being my friend this day, Glen. As for Ian... we'll see. I think a talk with Xan or the Hawke... and if I can once again prove to myself that I am worthy of him, then I won't give him up."

"Talk to him too. Let him know what you're feeling. Communication is pertinent in a relationship." He started walking them back towards Camelot. "As for me... I'll always be here for you. For you are my friend... and I can't give up on you." He patted her hand.

She smiled a bit more, the action not so forced, "Aye, and you must know that I am here for you as well...and I'll not give up on you either, or your Leona."

Glen nodded as he opened the door to the firehall. "That is good to hear, Lady. Very good to hear..." He led Skye in ahead of him and for the first time since that horrible night, the Light began to fight its way to her.

Skye Blackthorn 10/99


Absence of Light IX

A new chorus of sounds heralded the dawn in Camelot...
Crack. Crack. Whoosh. Grunt. Thud.
'Ow Blackthorn, my ribs damnit.'
Crack. Thud.
'Oof, you trying to take my head off, Morri?'
'Nay, I'm trying to teach you to duck.'
... and the lessons continued.

Every dawn found Skye in the arena, the sweat pouring off of her as she focused, battled, and usually got soundly thrashed. She was getting better, the bruises on Morrigan's ribs attested to that. At least now Skye didn't leave the arena bleeding as badly. What Skye couldn't know is that after each session, and each improvement, her teacher smiled to herself. Skye was back, living, and cursing, and the light was beginning to shine again.

A smile curved The Morrigan's ruby lips. "Oh Blackthorn, my son...won't YOU be surprised when you return home?"

Skye was tired, in body and in mind. The daily poundings were taking its toll, but her spirit felt rejuvenated. The archery leaders had looked at her in shock as she made her way to the stables and gave her directions to the stablemaster. Fyre was to be segregated, he would only accept commands from her, and no other rider would grace his back. She alone would care for him, and yes, she was riding patrol again.

As the animal moved beneath her, Skye concentrated... first a long flat grassy meadow, now the edge of the woodlands... finally up and down the hills and along the seashore. Every terrain felt different to the horse and rider. Every scene changed in temperature, and smell, and sound. Fyre knew his way, even without her hands to guide him. He was reacting well to the pressure of her knees and her whispered commands to him in Gaelic. She had learned the tricks from Ian, and only now did she see how valuable the training was. Smiling softly, she chuckled, "There's another one he was right about, Skye."

Returning from patrol, she thought about all she had learned so far, and the lessons still to come. It had taken her a few days to really begin to still herself, to get past the thoughts flying around in her head. And the feeling had come, just as Xan said it would...the warmth spreading through her like the glow of the hearth on a cold winter night. Starting in the core of her and spreading through her limbs, the feeling all at once relaxed and energized her. Every day, she vowed...every day she would take the time to partake of the life giving energy that Xan had showed her how to tap into. But first...something for the bruises and aches.

So it was that Skye arrived in Camelot, tired, dirty, and sore and made her way to the workroom. No longer tapping the staff out in front of her, but carrying it at her side, a valued weapon and support only if needed. She smiled at the changed stock, thanking Peligrance again in her heart.

Fumbling about in the jars for the salve she sought, the smells coming at her fast and swirling around her senses, she never even sensed the tall figure enter. Moving silently behind her, he caught her wrists and gently pulled her hands behind her back. Skye tensed, ready to level him with a kick but the arms enfolded her gently, holding her close in an embrace not threatening but soothing. "You..." the whisper was cut off by his fingertips gently beckoning for her silence. He had not said a word, and kept her hands behind her with one of his own.

Strangely enough she was not afraid, his presence feeling familiar to her, although deprived of her true sense of smell, and being given no voice to hear, it was instinct and instinct alone that carried her through. His lips replaced the hand at her mouth in a kiss that was both gentle and firm, warm and reassuring. Skye moved toward him, feeling his taller frame bending down to take from her.

Inside she smiled. He was home...and as soon as the kiss was over, he released her completely, leaving her breathless.

Skye grabbed the table for support and as soon as she could, she spoke. "You're home early, husband. What a delightful surprise."

And the empty workroom echoed with the sound of her voice. She was once again alone.

Skye Blackthorn 10/99